Wiener Factory: These Babies Snap!

THE WIENER FACTORY
14917 Ventura Bl, Sherman Oaks
818.789.2676
Click for a Map to The Wiener Factory

Winner of the 2004 Top Dog Award
for Best Polish Sausage in Los Angeles

PARTICULARS:
Standard Dog, Hot or Mild Polish Sausage
Chicken Dog, Chili, Red Onion, Sauerkraut
Red Cabbage, Cole Slaw, German Potato
Salad, Fries, Chips
Health Department Rating: A

DISTINCTIONS:
Incredibly snappy dogs, Turkey Dog
with natural lamb casing



At Christmastime, when Steve Doggie-Dogg was just a wee pup, his big brother would always volunteer to hand out the presents. He did this so he could hide all of his presents in a hoard behind the tree until everyone else's presents had been opened. The anticipation of opening the presents was just as important to him as actually opening them. We've been doing the same with the Wiener Factory in Sherman Oaks. Steve used to hang out here all the time. We knew it was a "goodie" so we saved it to savor the anticipation of a really good dog. The other day, the exquisite torture of waiting got too intense, so Jon the Food Slob and Steve zipped on down to The Wiener Factory to get their fill of glorious frankfurters. It was a bright sunny day, with temperatures in the mid-nineties... the perfect day to enjoy America's favorite tubular meat product.



When we arrived and got out of the car, our nostrils were greeted with a wonderful smell... the aroma of fresh hot dogs smoking. The Wiener Factory isn't called a factory for nothing... they make their own dogs and sausages from scratch right on the premises. Hypnotized by the tantilizing scent, Steve and Jon were inexplicably drawn to a large, steel-plated door in the back of the hot dog shack. "What's in there?" Jon asked. "Why, that's the hot dog incubator!" Steve explained. "Behind that door stands row upon row of tiny hot dog eggs... ready to hatch forth into cute little cocktail frank chicks. Eventually, they'll grow up to be big, strapping hot dogs for us to eat!" Jon sighed, "Ain't nature grand?"



We walked around to the front door and went inside to place our order. The Weiner Factory is a great place to eat, even on days that aren't as nice as this one was. Steve Doggie-Dogg remembers well the magic of entering the joint on a drizzly Sunday morning a couple of years back... As he opened the door, a cloud of delicious smelling steam wafted out engulfing him. It was one of those experiences that remind you what a joy it is to be alive. Today, however was a sizzler... and the place was packed. The walls of The Wiener Factory are festooned with delightfully inproper jokes scrawled in black marker... "For Sale: Parachute, only used once, never opened, slight stain." "The punishment for bigamy is two mother-in-laws." etc. There's also a wonderful doodle on the wall by Mad Magazine's Sergio Aragones. (That alone is worth the pilgrimage!) We had a lot of fun standing in line and reading the jokes out loud to each other. I'm sure the folks that work there hear the same jokes repeated over and over more times than Shecky Greene's barber!

Steve ordered a Mild Polish and a Standard Dog, both with Red Cabbage, Brown Mustard and Cheese. He also called for a Slaw Dog with Mustard and Cheese, a side of German Potato Salad and a jumbo Diet Coke. Jon the Food Slob decided on a Standard Dog with relish, onions and mustard, and a Polish with Mustard, Onions and Cheese. He picked a knish as a side dish and a Diet Coke to wash it all down with. They started lining up the order right away in a custom made wooden hot dog palette. (We should have gotten a photo of it... we want one for our own backyard barbecues now!) We told the nice lady behind the counter that we'd be outside on the patio when the dogs were ready. It didn't take long...



We weren't disappointed. Steve immediately grabbed his Polish with Red Cabbage and bit down on it. Wow! Textbook perfect snap and a juicy squirt of spicyness in every bite. The Wiener Factory's Polish Sausage is the best we've had so far... we particularly like the fun little tassels of natural casing on each end. The Standard dogmeat wasn't anything to sneeze at either. It was snappy and squirty, but perhaps it could use a bit more smokey spice like the dogs at Carneys. The buns were pretty ordinary. Nowhere near as good as the Poppyseed ones we've been getting on our Chicago Dogs. But at least they were warm and not too soggy.



The Red Cabbage was a big treat for both the eyes and the tastebuds... purpley-red and delicious. Steve felt that it was even better than the great Red Cabbage on the Bockwurst at The Stand. The Slaw didn't come close to matching the "Mom-made goodness" of The Stand's Cole Slaw though. It was generic and flabby, like the stuff you find in the cottage cheese tubs in the market. Even though it was tasty and piping hot, The Wiener Factory's Knish wasn't quite as good as The Stand's either. Jon was impressed by the quality and quantity of the cheese on his dogs. The heat of the meat made it melt beautifully, holding the rest of the condiments together. He found that they put a bit too much relish on his dog for his taste, but after scraping a bit off, it was perfect.



One of the nicest things about The Wiener Factory is the way the food is presented. We couldn't get over how pretty the dogs looked sitting there on the tray. The green of the Pickle Relish, the bright orange of the Cheese and the rich burgandy of the Red Cabbage were as pretty to us as any bouquet of flowers we've ever seen. Each dog is wrapped in white paper with a little twist on top, and opening them up is like opening up presents at a birthday party.



We sat and enjoyed the "Hot Dog Afterglow" for a while, watching the cars whiz by on Ventura Blvd. Steve pointed out that we were sitting smack dab in the middle of the hot dog "Miracle Mile", with Carney's and QT's Chicago Dogs just a bit to the East, and Rubin's Red Hot and The Stand a ways to the West. That's an awful lot of good eating in a relatively small area. We're not entirely sure how Ventura Blvd ended up housing so many hot dog joints, but we're pleased as punch that it did.

Just before we were getting ready to go, Jon the Food Slob pointed out that neither of us had tried The Wiener Factory's Chili. We couldn't properly rate the place without taking that into account, so we trooped back inside and asked for a small taste. Unfortunately, the Chili was no great shakes. It was starchy, but at least it had some discernible meat in it. Neither of us thought it was worth defiling a dog with. We thanked the folks behind the counter and turned to leave. Steve stopped dead in his tracks. "Oh my God!" he exclaimed. "What? What?" Jon asked. "First Sherman Hemsley, then Bozo the Clown, then Tony Orlando... now THIS!" Dumbfounded, Steve pointed up to an autographed picture over the door. "Holy cow!" Jon the Food Slob whispered under his breath, "Is it real?. "Yes, it is." Steve answered with awe and astonishment. Folks, it doesn't get any better than this...



Mr. friggin' T! We were still dazed and starstruck as we walked to the car. "To think that I sat in the same place, eating the same dog as a member of the A Team!" Jon marvelled. Steve nodded thoughtfully. "How do we translate this into a Dog Rating?" We discussed it for a while, and decided that the Polish dogmeat and Red Cabbage made The Wiener Factory even a bit better than Carney's... but the lackluster Chili was enough to put it just a dog hair under Skooby's. So, Four and a Half Dogs! A damn fine showing. We won't deny ourselves the joy of The Wiener Factory any more. This place is going right up to the top of our list.

UPDATE: Already? Yep...

Chicago Mike wanted to try this place that we were making such a big deal about... He was skeptical and wanted proof before we published this review. He ordered a pair of Chicago Dogs, and though he thought the dogmeat was good, he liked the spicing of the Standard Dog at Carney's better. He really liked the buns, but felt they'd be even better with Poppyseeds. His fries were excellent, well done and crunchy with a dusting of seasoned salt, but not quite as potatoey-good as the fries at Skooby's... The toppings on Mike's dog were the best he'd had outside of Chi-town, even if the relish didn't glow in the dark. But the best thing about The Wiener Factory to Mike was the atmosphere. Looking around at the decor, the customers and the people behind the counter, Mike admitted, "This place is a real dog stand." High praise from a Chicago boy!